TERRORISM : RISE OF SIN

Pakistan seems to be seeing the worst possible times . More and more people are indulging into terroristic activities . The indulgence has become so high that it's similar to the craze for a MBA degree in India , among youth . And , in the society , a terrorist seems to be respected as a civil service officer . Such has turned the case that it seems every ambitious child dreams of becoming one . And the result of such desires -

guys eating at a resturaunt , not satisfied with the dishes served , rush to the owner ... boom!! bombed!! ... unable to bear the death of hero in the movie ... boom!! bombed !! ... angry for being abused by the teacher .. boom !! bombed !! ...

So , the karachi sensex would show a reading , for the bomb manufacturing company ' LB - lashkar Bombs ' ,

day1 LB - 259 , day 2 LB- 332 , day 3 LB- 447 ......

Every pakistani would be eager to buy shares of these bomb manufacturers !!

It would be of no surprise if a caught terrorist comes out with an story like

"A nation wide examination CATIIT ( common admission test for International Institute of Terrorism) is held anually . Nearly half of youth in Pakistan appear for the examination . And after a few months Central counselling is organized following the result declaration. Courses offered are

course 1 - Bachelor in terrorism across India ( B.TAI)

course 2 - Bachelor in terrorism across West ( B.TAW)

Boys earlier used to choose B.TAW because the companies recruiting were MNCs . Working with such firms helped excelling faster . Also the pay given by these companies are very high . Dream companies like 'Al-QAEDA international LTD ' offerred international postings across UK and US ... in short cosmopolitan life , high salary , and huge respect .

But now the situation has changed after the 'collapse of terror-nomy' .. its not at all worthy , infact quite risky .. no job security , life risk . Also , if caught then ...HELL !!

So , most of all those who are applying have resorted to B.TAI . The companies recruiting dont pay much , but then there is job security ,... life risk ?? - not at all !! cause if caught then shall be enjoying free meals , lodging , medication and media attention as long as in detention and then if co-employees organize a hostage situation then will be able to return back to see their beloved ones , else will be pardoned by the Govt. of India , thanks to the pressure of Opposition and NGOs . "

Wondering about these bombs , one day it could surface that people apply for BL - bombing license , in Pakistan . First a Learner's License and then after a month the BL ...

And when police happens to catch a person bombing ... he would perturb to ask

" license please!! "

26/11 : TURMOIL

Rat-tat-tat goes guns in public , innocent lives lost , a city of more than 15 million succumbs with shock and anxiety , politcians resume their immoral game beginin with a lusture ridden speech by our honourable PM.


Journalist begin their hit out and earn business . So an aspiring journalist , trying to shine his boots , ends up interviewing


Q : Mr . Lalu Yadav what do you have to say about our Heritage Taj Hotel

A : I Taj hotelwa inside only some taims go ... bhery prablem (very problem)... I , toh ladka taim(time) se adjust to "lota and magga " ... inside Taj toh tissue paper there ... now , Heritage Building hain , so this toh there will be ... But i feel bhery sorry ... and i bhant(want) to tell mumbaivasi my sorry ... I see , if i can , i bill(will) start a train fram PATNA to Taj to send my bihari bhai log to fight terrorism .... humre bihar ka log desh k liye jaan tak de dega !!

Q : Didi Mayawati , would you like to convey your condolenses .

A : I , the Dalit ki beti , am bhery sorry about all this jo hua hain . I , the dalit ki beti , think that the ruling party ne kiya hain for election stunt . I , the dalit ki beti , am bhery sorry ki aaj desh me all this happening ... that is bhy(why) vote me and make me the agla PM ... oops !! i forgot to use " i , the dalit ki beti " in the last line ... O! Dr . B .R Ambedkar please maf karo , to me .... I , the dalit ki beti , pramise to fir se erect our heritage building ... i , the dalit ki beti , will then name the building ' ambedkar heritage' ...

Q : Mr . VilasRao Deshmukh , people out their need an answer . what do you have , to say ??

A : I have a deep feeling of sorrow for all those who have had their worst time because of this situation . I am working hard to unite the nation on such an adverse situation . And the idea that i have resorted to is making a movie titles " VILASRAO KI AAG " ... and for this i have chosen Ritesh , my son , to be the lead actor ... to compromise the budget ... and for the directorial part .. i have decided to hand it over to Ramu , dint you guys watch " RAMU KI AAG " ... And ya jus to keep the democratic spirit alive .. i have opened a public poll ..

to vote for NISHA KOTHARI - send NK to 5655

to vote for URMILA MATONDKAR -send UM to 5655

and to vote for MALLIKA SHERAWAT - send MS to 5655...

Q : Mr . Manmohan Singh , would you like to address the nation ??

A : My dear countrymen this flagitious act of terrorism is totally inhumane and i condemn it , so dont have to fear any more . JAI HIND!! ...

( what!! condemn and no more fearing ??!! )

Q : But Mr . PM what have you done other than condeming ??

A : I have tried calling Mr. Zardari . Well he was busy but his secratary ,who attended the call , told me that he was busy shaking hands with Ms . Pallin !! .. I will try calling him again in the evening . Also i am thinking to invite him to India , to discuss the matter . GHAJINI will be releasing soon, may be we can have some relaxed time watching the movie . After all it is warmth and affection that helps in spreading love and friendship . . . okay! enough for now , gotta get to work , lunch time , Rahul baba and Sonia ma'am might be hungry !!

PS : GOD BLESS MY COUNTRY

TALLI TIME

Filling a fourth of a glass ... then pouring soda .... chips and other sidies ready ... lit a cigarette ... then the bissfull sip ... sip after sip ... parallely runs music " hui mehek bahut hi sharaab ki ... thodi ,thodi piya karo " ...

This is the way thausands and thausands of college goers light their weekend lamp . And this habit is seldom appreciated , infact it actually is criticised and looked down upon . But then there are things about this , that is worth a watch ...

Imagine , if you were to fix a hidden camera in a bachelor's residence . So when the anxiety knock's the door , every body would start up

" dude !! long time since we had our thirst quenched "

"ya ! you are right !! .... i had a tough time in coll ...need to unwind !! "

" me too ..."

Eventually the decided hour closes in . After an evening stroll , guys rush for an evening shower. when LMN happened to ask PQR to share his towel

"buddy can i borrow your towel "

" ya buddy . . . how can i turn you down ... close friends , right ??!! "

Now , all is ready ... sip after sip goes in , few gulp it ... and then the talks begin

"Sssscoundrrrrrelllllllll !!!!! .... how dareee ! you use my towel ... what close friends ?? ... does that mean that i have to smell your crap in my towel .... i want it washed ... !!! "

" who the hellllll ..... saley!! "

Few , who for whole the week pretended to be a caring guy for a gal , call her up

" yar julie . . . you are so sweet .... dont get me wrong .... i love you ... dont think that i am drunk .. i love you "

" so you boozed "

... ( disconnect) ... redial ... ( number busy ) ....

And ,few guys fail to differentiate between a guy and a gal . Guy , such , would catch hold of a mate and then start pouring out all their feelings

" yar !! those guys trouble me a lot ... i feel so un - appreciated "

" buddy !! come on!! you are a man ... walk with you chest wide spread "

Few with some very peculiar cries

" donno why !! but i feel nobody likes me ... do you like me ?? temme ?? "

" well ... a a a ... mm mm mm "

" dont prentend ... see !! even you dont !! "

" !! "

Slowly the drink start taking tolls ... one after the other , guys drop down .

In the morning guys get up to see things all so hapazard . It's all like guys lying over the other , war veterans !! .. slowly the night's drama unfolds pretended dramas revealed . So many acts get heads go down with shame .... And then , the remorse ... lets booze again !!

patiala peg lagake .. teri gali vich ake , sab sudh budh hosh gavake , dewana, main pagal ,

main talli ... main talli .. main talli ho gaya "